Declutter Your Life a.k.a Make More Space For Happiness
Did you know that once you start searching for ways to declutter your life, this means you are fed up with it?
Do you feel tired of all the negative thoughts, beliefs, the mess in the wardrobe, the stuffed cabinets, the unhealthy habits and … everything else I missed?
The mess in our lives is a perfect environment for anxiety and depression, low level of satisfaction in life and leads to overall unhappiness. Even if everything seems to be alright.
Let’s fix that!
In this post, you will find out the most important areas of your inner self that need change and decluttering. We will also go through the rooms of your house and see what we could do about them too.
What is the Main Reason We Feel Unhappy?
Believe it or not, the state of our wardrobe has everything to do with our lack of satisfaction in life.
Read this quote by Haruki Murakami and read it slowly. Pay attention to how things in your life will click together in seconds after you read it.
“Things outside you are projections of what’s inside you, and what’s inside you is a projection of what’s outside. So when you step into the labyrinth outside you, at the same time you’re stepping into the labyrinth inside.”
Your outside world could only reflect your inside world.
The mess outside exists because there is a mess inside.
And so on…
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Decluttering Your Life is Getting Your Life Together
I’m sure you’ve heard of GYST.
That’s one of the most discussed topics lately – having days to get your life together, a.k.a. GYST days. The idea behind it is to do everything you didn’t have time to do, including cleaning your house, finishing your working projects, self-care and pampering, etc.
So, think of decluttering your life as getting it back together. It’s putting everything where it needs to be, looking the way it’s supposed to look. It’s reducing things that don’t belong to your world – physical or inner.
And everything clicks together.
Alright, I get It! But How To Start Decluttering My Life?
Thank you for asking!
If whatever is inside is outside, it sounds logical to start from inside. Reducing the mess in my head would motivate me to reduce the mess in my house, right?
But you and I, both, know that we can’t just wave a magic wand in front of the mirror and say “Declutter Yourself” for things to happen. (we could always try, though). It takes hours to clean the kitchen, but it takes weeks or months to change our beliefs and develop new habits.
At the same time, if you start cleaning your house before you have the right mindset to do it, you’ll just end up back in the beginning – more tired than before.
Very often we don’t do what’s good for us just because we don’t know where to start..
I love planning.
You love planning.
Everybody loves planning.
Either is going to be on a new notepad, a piece of paper or on the back of your grocery shop receipt – plan it!
Work with what you already have: negative beliefs, negative self-talk, no time (yes, that’s something you have – “no time”), messy bedroom, cluttered garage and pantry room, too many friends on Facebook, etc.
Write a long list of things that need to change.
Split them into two categories – Inside World and Outside World.
Pick a Fight!
Pick the hardest one from the Inside World list and start there.
I know I said, that changing your mindset and decluttering your inner world could take a while. That’s why you start first there.
The more time you work on it, the better. Working on reducing negative self-talk, for example, could fit in almost any daily activity outside your working place (or even there, if possible).
That means you will do both things together. Telling yourself how productive you are while rubbing the dirt out of your oven works, I’m telling you. Reminding yourself, you have a beautiful home is much easier when you’re dusting the shiny TV stand or hovering the soft carpet in your bedroom.
All I’m saying is – work on both fields at the same time. The mental declutter improves when we see outside results. Loving what you see helps you reduce stress and boosts your self-esteem. You are simply happy with yourself.
“Inside World” Things You Want To Declutter in Your Life
Let me give you a few examples of what you might want to clear your life from and how to do it.
Negative Self Thoughts and Core Beliefs
Decluttering your inner life could never be complete if you don’t remove your negative self-thoughts and core beliefs.
Yes, you have them.
Core beliefs are so dangerous that just one of them could ruin your whole life. You express your negative core beliefs through negative self-talk.
“I’m not beautiful. Nobody ever likes me.” That’s a negative core belief.
“I will never be able to create a family.”
“I am a failure.”
“I don’t have any friends. Everyone uses me.”
“People cannot be trusted.”
“I have a horrible taste of men/women.”
All these are examples of negative core beliefs.
How to find out yours?
The best way to identify your negative core beliefs is to notice them in your everyday life. Pay attention to what you think during the day. Shortly after you start taking mental notes on what you tell yourself it will be easier to spot the core beliefs.
How to declutter your life from negative core beliefs?
I have someone I’d like you to meet:
Meet Positive Affirmations
Positive Affirmations is your new BFF.
The power of positive affirmations was proven so many times by different life-teachers such as Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay, Robin Sharma, John Kehoe, Tony Robbins, etc.
They are a great way to start your day and even better way to calm your mind in the evening time. Positive affirmations work slowly on a subconscious level and gently create new beliefs. They act like a broom that sweeps up your daily negativity and throws it away, bit by bit.
Depending on what you struggle with you could create your own positive affirmation or use a ready-made one. Here are a few beautiful affirmations by Louise Hay to help you start with.
Others’ Negative Opinion of You
This is something most of us are guilty of.
Wayne Dyer says:
“How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.”
You don’t want negative karma to keep you awake at night and to be on your way to a better clutter-free life. Nobody wants that.
Letting go of what people think of you is so liberating. Understand that whatever their opinion is, it’s a reflection of their own state of mind and quality of life. No one lives in your shoes and could understand you better than yourself. At the same time, you could never dictate and tell people what to think of you. It’s their right to have an opinion – like it or not.
Let me tell you the ridiculous way I fight negative opinions. It works for me, so it could be something to think about.
I imagine people’s opinions like walking Things. They don’t have shape and don’t look like anything. However, I imagine they are physical Things that walk towards me every time someone expresses their opinion of something in my life (opinion based on their limited observation).
These Things (the opinions) walk towards me and my inner home. As the host of this inner home, I have the choice to either open the door and to let them in or to leave them outside and forget they are there. Visualising how I leave negative opinions outside my world is the most powerful way for me to fight back. Try it yourself.
Once you declutter your life from other people’s negative opinions, you will breathe deeper and more freely.
Ready to keep cleaning your Inner World?
Clean Your Life From Judgment
Let’s not pretend the only problem is the other people’s opinion.
I admit I was judging people a lot.
Every time I would share with someone the fact I am a relationship blogger, they would start telling me their love stories. They would complain from their spouses, comment on how their partner treats them, share memories, etc.
And sometimes I would judge them.
I would see clearly if they do something unhealthy in their relationship and when they’d reject my opinion (completely normal thing), I would judge them.
And this was wrong.
When I decided to declutter my Inner Life that was the first place I started from. Do you remember I asked you to pick the biggest fight and start there? That was my big fight.
In some ways, it still is. But I could see the progress.
How I declutter my mental life from judging others?
I would rudely interrupt myself the second I realise I judge someone and will spend the next few minutes trying to see things from their point of view.
This is your best friend if you struggle with judging people.
Empathy is trying to understand what the other goes through, acknowledging the fact they do their best at any point and letting go of the urge to express an opinion – positive or not.
Using empathy isn’t making excuses for the other when he fails or suffers. Empathy is understanding that at any point in our life we do our best. And that’s all.
“Outside World” Declutter Ideas to Make It Easier
I am sure you don’t need too many ideas on where to start to declutter your home.
However, let me tell you what I do first.
Clean All Of The Rubbish
I would usually get a plastic bag and go through every single room in the house picking all of the rubbish around – this could be receipt we shouldn’t keep, notes, lists I do all the time and leave everywhere, empty mail envelopes, etc.
Your first step in decluttering your home should be starting with things you don’t need to decide if you should keep or not. That’s the easiest way.
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Find Things’ Home
Everything in your house has its home.
If you see something isn’t in its home – send it there.
Put the dishes in the dishwasher, set up the washing machine, remove everything from the sofa, the TV stand, the kitchen counter.
If you are unsure where to place certain thing get a separate box or a basket and keep it there until you finish with every room. After that, go back to this box and see if you should create more space for the things in it or you don’t need them at all.
Do One Room At A Time
Decluttering your life and home could be overwhelming.
Don’t dive into the deep areas all at once.
One room at a time is your way to go. You might want to start with your bedroom first. It’s the place you use to rest and recharge yourself at the end of the day. Therefore, the atmosphere in it is the most important one. No matter if you are single or in a committed relationship, your bedroom is your sacred space. Every other room comes after that.
Don’t Throw Away Things
One person’s rubbish is another person’s treasure.
Give things away.
First of all, it’s nature-friendly and saves from this planet’s recourses.
Second of all, you could actually help someone a lot by simply giving things to charity shops.
The last thing – you don’t “throw away” the money you spend on this item when buying it. Very often we restrain ourselves from decluttering and cleaning the house from unnecessary items because we imagine ourselves throwing our money away. It’s not a pleasant visualisation, but in some weird way, it’s true.
Give things away.
Decluttering Your Life is a Never-Ending Process
Letting go of things – mental or physical is an ongoing process that never stops.
Sometimes we do everything for a day or two. A week later we realise we’re in the middle of the same mess. We start thinking we used the wrong technique or we’re hopeless in keeping our life tidy (did you spot the negative core belief here?).
None of this is correct.
Decluttering is a never-ending process of staying away from cluttering our mental and physical world.
Don’t just repeat positive affirmations for a month. Repeat them every day until you unplug the negative belief.
Don’t just declutter your house once and forget about it. Spear a day or a few hours a week to do it constantly.
It’s all about the habit, and if you stick with doing things right long enough, you won’t have to remind yourself what to do. It will come naturally.
Never give up. Take one step at a time.
Approach things with love and care.
Do it and if you leave things halfway, start all over again.
You can walk today because you didn’t give up after falling every time you tried walking many years ago.
It’s the same with everything else in life. We live, and we learn.
And its never too late to give up on bad habits, clean our mental and physical world and keep it decluttered for life.