How do you know when your marriage is falling apart?
Aren’t you tired of getting less happiness in your marriage than you deserve?
Do you have a feeling your marriage is failing and how to know if it really does?
There are 7 main signs your marriage is falling apart, and if you tick off all the boxes – you might want to spear some time on how to fix your marriage before it’s too late.
In this article, I will list them all.
Also, you will find out about the 7 crucial habits of every healthy and strong marriage and 7 secret keys to fixing your broken marriage.
Wow, that’s so much valuable information. You are about to hop on a life-changing journey.
Let’s dive in.
1. Boredom in marriage
You know what?
Marriage isn’t an on-going party 24/7 and life could get boring now and then. You both go to work, have some dinner, deal with the kids’ homework, send them in their beds, and watch TV until the time to finally put your tired bodies in the bed come.
It sounds familiar and normal.
It sounds worrying and boring.
And while the first part is correct (marriage isn’t a 24/7 party), the fact your days go in the same similar routine week after week and month after month is destructive to your marriage.
None of you signed for emotionless grey evenings full of children’s screaming and glamour TV shows for life. And I am sure that even if it sounds normal if you ask yourself “Is this how I want my days to look like for the rest of my life?” you will feel a panicking ball forming in your guts.
Because you know that’s not right.
And just because everyone spends their days in this way, it doesn’t mean it’s healthy and will make you happy.
Your marriage could be on the road of falling apart if you are constantly bored, every day.
If your spouse feels bored too, can you guarantee they are happy staying like that forever?
Related Post: 10 STRESS FACTORS THAT SLOWLY KILL YOUR HAPPINESS
2. No Affection in Marriage
The butterflies might be long gone from your relationship with your spouse, but it doesn’t mean the connection and the affection should disappear too.
Fact: The lack of affection in marriage is the first reason for married people to feel distant from their partner, and that could gradually grow into lack of love and even infidelity. None of which would make you happy.
I completely understand you.
Feeling lonely in a marriage is one of the most heartbreaking feelings ever. You are with someone who is supposed to be the love of your life and at the same time, you feel you couldn’t be further away from him. It’s painful and devastating.
It is also a sure sign your marriage is falling apart.
3. Poor Communication
Somehow, in 80% of the cases, wives are the ones to spot this first.
Poor communication means that you don’t have to emotionally connect with your spouse. It feels like you don’t have much to talk about, you both live your separate lives, talk over the same stuff all the time and eventually go over the most important topics of the day and leave it there.
But what about the soul-touching midnight conversations you used to have? Where did they go?
You always had what to talk about, and now things have changed.
On top of that, it looks like you both love each other, but somehow never know what to discuss.
Broken communication is a very common problem in every relationship and especially in marriages that last for over 5 or even 10 years.
Maybe at some point, you decided you don’t want to ask him of his opinion because you already know what he’ll say. Maybe he thought the same, a practice that multiplied for a few hundred times, and you ended up talking about insignificant things for the last few months or so.
Is it possible that you tried to approach your spouse on a subject, but he overreacted, and you felt rejected and disrespected? Why would you initiate another similar conversation after that?
Unfortunately, all these signs of poor communication could hurt your connection with your spouse and eventually lead to its failure.
Related Post: 3 ACTION STEPS TO MAKE WHEN YOUR HUSBAND IGNORES YOU
4. Negativity in Marriage
We’ve all been there.
We go home at the end of a very, very (very) stressful day, open the door and start bombarding our partner with negativity, badmouthing everyone we met today and be grumpy for hours.
We are negative.
Because we are stressed. We are tired of chores. We are fed up with stupidity at the office and overwhelmed with tasks we don’t enjoy.
Then, our spouse does something small and “unthoughtful”, and we point our anger towards him. Screaming or staying grumpy, giving the silent treatment, rejecting every try to change our mood…
Negativity kills your happiness in marriage.
Negativity kills every relationship you have – even the one with yourself.
And it will definitely be a reason for a failed marriage.
Related Post: 42 WAYS TO START LOVING YOURSELF MORE TODAY
Many painful things could fail marriage, but infidelity holds the first place. It’s devastating and hard to accept. It’s even harder to forgive a cheating spouse.
How do you move on after you find out your spouse has cheated on you?
How do you trust them again?
How do you look into their eyes and feel the touch of their hands without thinking about “the other”?
Infidelity is the most obvious sign that your marriage is going down fast, and you must act.
Related Post: TO THE CHEATING HUSBAND WHO DOESN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO…
6. Broken Trust
The previous sign – infidelity usually causes it.
However, not always.
A broken trust could occur after broken promises, being let down many times or because of poor communication.
To make matters worse, broken trust accompanied by any other sign on this list is a deal-breaker for your marriage.
You might mistake this with No Affection sign for a failing marriage, but rejection could be even more painful.
Many men feel rejected by their wives, especially when it comes to bedroom activities. And while ladies don’t think it’s something significant to say No to intimacy for a few days in a row, most men feel deeply wounded by it.
You see, men are thought to be tough and strong. Their only time to strip down their toughness and be vulnerable is when they make love to their woman. If they feel they’ve been rejected over and over again, they slowly withdraw themselves. That’s when they will stop hugging their wife, asking her if she needs help or initiating any type of intimacy that she might enjoy.
And it’s not because they punish their lady, but because they feel she wouldn’t enjoy any of it. They would feel distanced and disconnected, and things will only go worse.
At this point, the woman already feels properly rejected on an emotional level. He doesn’t help in the house, he doesn’t kiss and hug her anymore; he is distant and never wants to talk to her. He initiates intimacy every once in a while, but how could he expect anything to happen in the bed if he doesn’t want to connect outside of the bedroom.
Women need emotional closeness to connect physically, and men need physical closeness to connect emotionally.
And if one of these points fail, the rest follow very fast.
Related Post: 7 OF THE WORST MARRIAGE MISTAKES WOMEN DO
Bonus: Lack of Love
General lack of love might sound boring and too summarising to you, right?
I feel you.
But by lack of love, I would like to list many small signs that your marriage is in danger and you must act before it’s’ too late.
- Ignoring each other’s needs and wishes
- Disrespect – intentional or not
- Lack of understanding.
- Not listening when the other talks, because you are too busy thinking he never listens to you, so why should you?
- Hidden hatred because one of you feels ignored and misunderstood.
- You are not spending enough (or any) time together to rekindle your relationship.
- Constant nagging or ignoring each other.
- Lack of compassion for the other.
All of them sound disturbing and need your attention. They also indicate deep problems in your marriage and a threat of falling apart.
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What To Do When You Know Your Marriage Is Falling Apart?
The first thing I would advise you to do is to further dig into the problems.
I know, it might seem like you have all of the marriage issues I listed above.
However, often, we exaggerate and overreact, and that’s normal. We are victims of our emotions, but this shouldn’t be a reason to mislead ourselves about the real size of a problem.
The first thing I’d like you to do is to get familiar with how healthy relationships and marriages work. You can never achieve a result unless you know how the result looks like, right?
So, here are 7 most important habits you must have developed before you start fixing your marriage.
They are connected to each other, don’t skip reading through them.
1. Honesty in Marriage
I know, it sounds so logical, right?
Who wouldn’t be honest when trying to fix their marriage? You are ready to honestly share everything that pisses you off in the other person …
But what about the honesty to admit that there are things you did or didn’t do that led you to that moment?
Are you ready to put your hand on your heart and admit what you did wrong? Because no marriage could survive if honesty isn’t present.
Related Post: HOW TO COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR PARTNER EFFECTIVELY
Once you’ve been honest with each other, are you kind enough to not explode and call names? Are you kind enough to hold your breath and not make things even worse? Are you kind enough to appreciate the other’s honesty?
Kindness should be something we all have, but it isn’t what we all practice. Being kind is a quality, but practising this kindness is a blessing to people around us… and ultimately ourselves.
Are you kind?
In this post about the 10 habits of every happy relationship, I talk about my sweet neighbours – a couple in their 70s that have one of the strongest relationships ever. They’ve been married for over 50 years, and one of the first things they said when I asked them about their secret was to say “compromises”.
You see… your partner isn’t perfect, and you are well aware of that by now.
But you aren’t perfect, either. Compromising with each other is an everyday activity both of you should practise. I don’t talk about compromising with stuff that really bothers you, but the small, insignificant things that wouldn’t matter in 5 years from now shouldn’t e a topic of an argument. Compromise.
Honesty will open your minds.
Kindness will be like a cold cream on burnt skin.
Compromising could fix things today.
But forgiveness will open your hearts and allow you to create your happily ever after.
Forgiveness is one of the hardest things we face in our lives. Letting go of the urge to “remind them how they treated us” is the secret pill to fixing your marriage when it’s falling apart.
Don’t shake your head; I know that’s logical. But I don’t talk about fidelity as not sleeping with other people.
Let me tell you something crucial that no one else wants to admit nowadays.
Marriage is still what it used to be.
Yes, we have a wider choice to “catch the right person”.
We have bigger responsibilities and louder arguments.
We have a bigger chance to fail.
Yet, we have a bigger chance to succeed too.
The world that limits us is actually the world that liberates us. With so many opportunities to learn and different ideas to put in practice, it is your infidelity towards the idea of marriage that will save your relationship.
Do you believe that marriage is just a piece of paper that hangs on the wall and doesn’t do the job? Or do you believe that marriage is a secret union of two souls, and it is you and your spouse that must make it work? No. Matter. What.
6. Will To Work
I’ll keep this short and sweet: Without the will to work and waiting for the other to fix themselves is your fastest way to the divorce.
7. Undivided Attention
Your marriage needs your undivided attention.
Everything you do from this day on should be in the name of making things work for you two.
Once you accept that there’s no other way but to fix things up and create the relationship you both deserve, you know you are on the right way.
Bonus: 7 Secrets To Fixing Your Marriage
Now, we’ve got the 7 signs your marriage is falling apart: boredom, no affection, poor communication, negativity, infidelity, broken trust and rejection (plus lack of love as a bonus).
We also covered the 7 must-have habits to start the process of fixing your marriage: honesty, kindness, compromising, forgiveness, fidelity towards the idea of marriage, will to work, and undivided attention.
Short: we’ve got the base.
Let’s get to work then.
There are 7 Secrets to Fixing Your Marriage. Mort Fertel has summarised them, and they have already helped over 3 000 000 people (yes, six zeros).
He was kind enough to allow me to share his unique approach with you (for FREE) and give you the opportunity to change your situation, starting immediately.
His 7 Secrets to Fixing Your Marriage cover important problems such as:
- Broken Trust
- How to Forgive and Ask for Forgiveness
- How to Get Over The Past
- How to Reconnect With Your Spouse
- How to Stay Together
Plus a Bonus (don’t you just love bonuses?): 5 MarriageAssessmentss – absolutely mindblowing and I recommend you go through them even if you don’t go through the program. They will take you less than an hour but will open your eyes for what went wrong between you and your spouse.
You could have immediate access to his free program “7 Secrets To Fixing Your Marriage” through here.
Why would you want to do that? Can’t You Try By Yourself
Of course, you can.
And you will probably find the crack and manage to convince the other to fix it.
But are you willing to risk and waste time wandering around in the dark?
Isn’t your marriage worth the extra few minutes of devoting your attention to something that’s proven to work? And it won’t cost you a dime. No one will ever try to fix your marriage for free. You know that.
Do you believe your spouse deserves the extra effort to show them you are serious about this thing between the two of you?
Sign up for your FREE 7 Secrets to Fixing Your Marriage now and start acting on your happiness. You deserve it so much.
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7 Signs Your Marriage is Falling Apart and How To Fix It