How to boost your libido by implementing new habits?
You love your partner but you feel you need to increase your sex drive as the way you feel lately is not sexy at all. Am I right?
Well, don’t blame yourself for it – your libido doesn’t work on voice command. Just because you lack desire for fun in the bed it doesn’t mean something’s wrong with you.
Your libido depends on many things like stress, hormones, lifestyle, confidence, health habits, and the simple relationship with yourself. But more about that later.
Whatever the reason, you know better than anyone how your normal sex drive feels like.
So, if something doesn’t match lately, there’s a reason behind it, and you will want to find it.
Before you start blaming yourself and feeling stupid you don’t desire your man as much as you want, try first focusing on your habits. Life is a chain of everyday actions, and they depend on our habits. The way we feel is often just a habit as well.
If you accept, just for a second that all this is true, then all you need to do is replace your bad habits with new, good habits.
It’s all in the head
As a woman, I must admit that low desire for intimacy usually comes without a reason and honestly, it’s all in the head. You could be with the love of your life; everything is so perfect that you wonder if you’re awake or you’re dreaming. But when it comes to sex, you’re just not there. Your thoughts are going from one topic to another, and you don’t feel in a mood for something like that. Sounds familiar? Here’s what you can do about it:
The best thing about meditation is not that it sounds trendy and exotic at the same time. The best thing is that it teaches you how to be present. Because, when you are in bed with your partner and want to focus on the task, your mind could either listen to you or fly around unable to stay in place.
Well, meditation will do the dirty job for you. Focusing on the present moment has never been so hard as it is these days.
At the same time, we’ve never been so blessed with knowledge as we are nowadays. That is what meditation will help you with. The present is the only place and time that exists, and meditation will help your mind stay in bed, with you while trying to enjoy yourselves.
♥ A book I strongly recommend having a look at is The Power of Now by Echart Tolle
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I will not take too much of your time to preach about stress.
Everyone knows that stress kills the sex drive, along with every other good emotion in our body and mind. On top of that, it could replace them with a long list of illness you never wish to think about. Find ways to distract yourself with something positive at least an hour before going to bed. Read a book, write in a journal, laugh with your partner, do something good for someone.
3. Read Something Pink…
One of the best ways to increase your libido right away is to read more books. But not just any book. Choose chick lit, an erotic novella, something spicy, and a little bit ridiculous. Whatever your opinion of this genre, you’ll find something to keep you focused.
The Third habit – Read chick lit
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4. Spare Some Time For You and Him
I know, both of you work, you have kids, you are so busy that all you could think about is getting to bed and having a few hours of rest before the next chaotic day arrives.
However, making love is an act of intimacy and closeness that starts long before you go into bed.
Keeping the fire burning between the two of you is essential for you.
Share your feelings, go back in your memories to some nice plays, open the photos on your phone, go through the crazy videos you have together.
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One day, my partner was feeling a bit down. There was no reason – just a cold, rainy day when nothing looks right nor bright. After we finished our telephone conversation, I went through my phone and found a video from one of our holidays on the seaside. The video was showing few minutes of a sunrise – it was a colourful combination of red sun, warm morning wind, the salty sound of the waves, our sleepy faces… it was the first time we welcomed the sunrise on the beach together, and it was one of my dreams coming true. So, I sent him the video. I knew I warmed his heart and took his mind to a better place, showing that there’s tomorrow as well. We had our warm mornings in the past, and we will have them in the future too.
Show love, talk, share emotions and care. Your libido will thank you for that.
The Forth habit – talk, share and care more
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5. Visit The Park or The Gym…
Exercising is one of the best ways to increase your sex drive. When jogging, lifting weights, walking or do any other physical activity, your body “wakes up” for action. Your adrenaline levels go high, and your blood starts “boiling”. All that will prepare you for the next exercise – testing your libido.
The Fifth habit – Exercise more
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6. Just Do It
Your intimate muscles are still muscles; you know that. Moreover, an orgasm is an actual contraction of your muscles in the intimate area of your body. Therefore, these muscles will be more trained to contract at the right time, if you train them well. Kegel’s exercises are the best way to do it. There’re even weights specially designed for that if you need help to start.
Sex is like the food, they say – the more you do it, the more you want to do it. I guess we can agree that having pleasure could be a bit addictive, can’t we? It’s all about the intimacy and the feel of wholeness.
But it is true that having sex is a habit as well, just like getting hungry every day in the same hours. Therefore, increasing the amount of time we are active in the bed you could actually increase your sex drive.
The sixth habit – Have more fun
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7. Use Your Imagination
Very often, the reason to miss out on hight libido: there’s nothing new about what will happen.
So why not…
Plan a Naughty Thursday every week and do something different, experiment with your bodies. Plan a romantic weekend away, explore your limits, get inspirations from movies. Push your imagination to work in that direction, give it a focus, and it will bloom.
The Seventh habit – Be creative
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8. You Are What You Eat
Like, literally! Whatever you put on your plate will become your blood, skin, bones, muscles… well, you!
That is why is so important to be aware of what you eat.
Junk food will not give you the energy to desire your man at 10 pm tonight. All of that grease will force your body to work harder to process it – hence, no energy for anything else.
A healthy diet though will increase your energy and libido. Remember stress and tiredness? You can get rid of them, simply by changing your diet. Moreover, if you already eat healthily, include more of these foods in your meals. They are on the top of the “boost your libido” food scale.
The Eight habit – Eat healthily
9. Medical Issues
Sometimes, the reason you just can’t make yourself feel in a sexy mood is medical. Health reflects on absolutely every single aspect of your physical and emotional life. So, let’s say that the last habit is to pay more attention to your health. Check for one of the following things:
During your period, you lose iron. That is the reason many women feel tired all the time, they’re pale, experience lack of energy and can’t wait to sleep for at least 10 hours.
You can easily check that by doing a blood test. Meanwhile, you can add more food rich ironing your blood, as well as getting food supplements to help you fight anaemia. Iron-rich foods are spinach, fish, eggs, beans, nuts, dried fruits, watercress, curly kale.
The primary job of your Pill is to decrease the levels of testosterone, hence – no chance to conceive. However, testosterone is the main hormone that causes high sex drive… or any drive. By decreasing the levels of restored, you automatically put pressure on your libido.
Consider consultation with your doctor regarding the change of the Pill or change the contraception method to see if your libido will be affected by it.
It is not only the testosterone that affects your desire for intimacy. Any hormonal misbalance will change it. For example, progesterone. Low levels of it can cause mood swings, fertility problems, weight gain, lack or low sex drive, crazy PMS and more. If you feel like you live a normal, healthy life, you’re not in a stressful period of your life, but you just feel unhappy and unable to enjoy your partner’s love, consider hormonal disbalance check. It might be the reason you’re losing so much joy in life.
The Ninth habit – Consult with the GP
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I hope you liked my healthy habits to boost your libido, but more importantly – they helped you find the right direction to better love life. If that happened, please subscribe to our blog so that you can enjoy the useful content.
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