If you recognize yourself in these words… keep reading
When you love him more than he loves you, you sacrifice almost your sanity for him. When you love him more it isn’t as easy as these words will sound.
It won’t flow like a stream.
It’s never easy to be the one receiving half-filled love, skewed love, thorned love back when all you try to do is genuinely give full love to the one person who seems to complete you. But we never quite realize that we are complete without another person, without an extra love, without another form of half-delivered love.
Isn’t it weird you love him more and more every day even though you are very sure the love you are receiving is not what you would wish to receive?
But love is blind, and you are so blinded to see you deserve better than one call a week. Late replies. So much waiting and Oh! Hoping. Hoping that one-day tables will turn, that someday you’ll feel real love, one day someone will impress you instead. And so you become the person always giving and loving more.
The Effortless Effort
Here’s the thing when you love him more than he loves you.
You go miles for this person. You travel a distance you’ve never thought in a second you’d travel to. You give your entire time, the majority of it because you love him more, and so you are always showing up.
You don’t care about the world at that moment because he is your world, and not a sentence I write will change that.
You become so invested in his life you forget about your own individuality, your own ways, probably even your own morals, You love him more. You cancel your entire schedule to meet his. You plan every trip and maybe even spend on him because you do not know how to deliver less.
You try to put up this perfect image for him. You love him too much, and so you cannot afford to lose him. Your love flows so immensely you know no other way. You assume the red flags that are well displayed in front of you even though this will be your doom.
When you love him more than he loves you, you show up at 2 am and 10 pm. You become so present in his life you almost forget to be there for yourself.
The Bitter Truth
See, every day you love him more than he loves you, you forget a piece of you. Day by day, bit by bit. Until one day, you wake up and you question, when did you come this far a person who could not reciprocate half of the love you gave out.
You forget that one time in the past, you did just well by yourself, and now you don’t even know where to start if he decides to walk away. You forget to show up to your friends and family because you have been too busy loving someone more.
You erase the idea of going on with your goals in life because you are ready to first meet his. You unapologetically pour yourself to someone who is not ready, probably scared to return the favor. But it’s comfortable where he is and what he is receiving, and so you will never quite know what you deserve or your worth when you’re the one who keeps loving more.
Don’t get this twisted; loving someone more than he loves you is sometimes a blessing and a curse, and what madness for a sentence to sound like this.
The New and the Old
When you’re the person who loves more than he loves you, you remember the tiniest details of their lives.
You have mastered how words flow from them. You can read their thoughts and actions loud and clear. You remember how they like their coffee in the morning. You can easily pick up on their energy because you have made the effort to dive deeper into their depth.
You inspire them to be better and you witness parts of them no soul has ever seen. You support them, you make them believe in their own goodness. You become part of them. You pick up some of their silliest traits. You already know what they will say in anger or rather how they’ll make you feel. They break you down severally and you still show up for them. You still stand strong for them.
The Endless Questions
Here’s the question? Who will love you more?
Don’t you want to feel the kind of genuine love you keep showing? Doesn’t it ache you that this undying love is not reciprocated?
Is it that good or bad that you have settled for half-filled love? Does it not drain you? Are you not tired to love more and more without you experiencing that same love? Don’t you just for once want someone to love you and give you all that you give out.
Does he know you hate red roses? Does he know your career is on hold for him? Does he genuinely know you hate sugar or that you’ve been trying to lose weight all these years without his support? Does he know you love him more, and he keeps getting the win? So many whys.
Reality Hits You
When you’re the person who loves more than him it gets to a point where it drains you.
Nothing more nothing less.
You start retracting your steps and you wonder why you would not deserve that same love. You get tired. Tired of always giving and never quite receiving. You hit a point you question your own worth when the problem isn’t you.
You start to doubt yourself if whether this is what you want. To be the bigger person every day of your life. You have forgotten how it feels to be alive.
You start feeling like something is amiss and you take a pause, or maybe a stop. A stop to you giving from an overflowing cup. A stop to you questioning yourself every day. A stop to loving him more and loving yourself more. A stop to forget your worth and what you deserve in life. A stop to being so empathetic and loving to a soul that cannot reciprocate that kind of love for a minute.
You too deserve more
When you love him more than he loves you, remember this, you deserve clarity. You deserve an honest and genuine kind of love. You deserve a love that doesn’t cost you confusion and pain. You deserve requited love.
Let this be a reminder that you should know what you deserve. You deserve exactly that same kind of love that you give out more. You are human at the end of the day and if something is not working out for you, know that you are allowed to walk out any minute of the day to demand the love you think you deserve.
Do not get so comfortable being squeezed in your space you forget to bloom; you forget that you also deserve a reciprocated kind of love. That what you’re searching for is out there; you just need to go and find it.
I know you love more, and sometimes loving too deeply and more makes us laugh, and sometimes it makes us bleed. You cannot force something to be more than it should. Sometimes the people we love cannot comprehend whatever we feel even if you gift them the whole world.
There will be times you’ll have to walk away from the very person for who you’d do anything. It’s not giving up, it’s simply survival, and I hope it’s you who survives.
When you’re the person who loves you more, know your limits because takers don’t know their limits. Yes, love endlessly but also give yourself a portion of that same love. Know that there is a right person who might just reciprocate the same love.
Yes, love genuinely but don’t get manipulated in it. Do not drown in it. Give yourself time to understand them better but do not fall victim to a half-filled draining love.
When you’re the person who loves more, know your limits but above all, give yourself that same kind of love because you also deserve it. You also deserve to experience a genuine and profound kind of love. You deserve also to be loved more by another human.
You deserve it all.
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When You Love Him More Than He Loves You
My blog is about what most people go through in life, the good and the toxic that society labels normal. It’s about facing your worst nightmares and some days your best experiences. Full of reminders that you might have forgotten along the way. This blog is always loving you from the shadows.