Why looking for signs he doesn’t love you anymore?
Let me guess.
Something’s going on in your relationship, and you are looking for 100% no-doubt signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
You often ask yourself looking for signs he doesn’t want a relationship with you anymore.
Moreover, you truly think that he is on the edge of breaking up with you.
So, how to tell if he doesn’t love you anymore? Does he even care about you?
If it turns out that you are with a man who doesn’t care about you, your heart is about to be broken.
Despite that, it’s far better to be happy alone than miserable with someone who doesn’t want you in his life. If your guy ticks the boxes on 3 or more of the signs below – he doesn’t really love you.
Also, I’ve got a bonus sign he doesn’t love you anymore, and it’s the most important one, so stick to the end of this.
So let’s dive in and find out if it’s true that he isn’t the one for you.
1. You feel anxious around him, and you don’t know why
Needless to say, if your boyfriend doesn’t love you anymore there’s a weird vibe he transmits onto you, and you feel it. He is probably more confused than you right now, and his anxiousness gets to you.
You often feel like you’re walking on eggshells and like you’re going to explode any second, trying to find out what’s’ going on in his head.
On top of that, if you are in denial and refuse to accept that he no longer loves you, then you are in the middle of inner conflict with yourself.
All that slowly kills your sanity, and you get panicked and scared of what the future will bring.
2. Your boyfriend doesn’t put any effort into the relationship anymore
It’s been a one-sided relationship for a long time.
And you know what?
You feel tired, annoyed and powerless all at once.
It’s clear that your relationship is failing, but he doesn’t do anything about it.
Moreover, he hasn’t initiated almost any of your last few (or even more) dates, and he doesn’t work on getting closer to you. There is no communication between you two anymore, and nothing could trigger him to invest his time in this relationship.
Most of all…
3. It looks like your boyfriend doesn’t care about you anymore
Here’s the deal.
When a man loves you deeply, he cares about the way you feel all the time.
Even when he has problems.
Even when he is out with friends.
Even when he has the right not to care.
When a man loves you, he is there for you. No. Matter. What.
But not your guy. He makes you feel left outside and alone. You need his support, but he’s nowhere to be found.
And this won’t surprise you: he doesn’t love you anymore.
4. He is distant emotionally
A man who is in love with you will look for ways to be close to you. And I don’t mean just the physical touch.
The essential connection that builds a strong and fulfilling relationship is emotional commitment and closeness.
This is the part where you will actually know for sure if he loves you or not.
Is he distant?
Does he prefer not to talk to you about things that bother him?
Do you feel he’s put a massive wall between you two and no matter how hard you hit it, you can’t find even a peephole so you could get to him?
Well, that’s a huge red flag that your guy isn’t comfortable being with you and he might not love you anymore.
5. He says he needs space
Agh, men and their need for space.
We, we all need space!
But there’s a healthy space between two people, and then there’s space that feels like he’s pulling away.
How to know if the space he needs is in the first category?
That depends on how long you’ve been together.
In the first few weeks or months, many couples prefer to spend all of their free time together. Once the honeymoon phase is over though, both of you need a little bit of space. You want to see other people and spend time with friends.
Can I be totally honest with you?
If that happens – it’s normal.
So what’s not normal then?
It’s not normal to push you away all the time. It’s not normal to see each other only once in the week (if there isn’t a good reason for it). Ignoring your calls because “he needs time alone”, not answering your messages for hours (all the time) isn’t normal.
But that’s not all…
6. Your partner doesn’t want you to bother him
Add this sign to the previous one.
Can you believe that I had an email from a lady who was saying that her boyfriend didn’t want to see her more than once a week?
She was depressed because she believed she loved him, but couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t want to spend more time together?
Are you in a similar situation?
Well, let me tell you that’s not OK. Your boyfriend doesn’t appreciate you; he doesn’t respect you and most of all – he doesn’t care about you.
He is using you.
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7. Communication issues as one of the signs he doesn’t love you anymore
Seriously, so many dating and relationship coaches have spent thousands of hours explaining it to all of us – communication is everything in a relationship.
Moreover, I’ve seen its importance in my relationships too.
How to know if you have communication issues?
Ask yourself these 4 questions:
- Do I feel 100% comfortable speaking to him about my problems?
- Does he actively listen to what I say?
- Am I aware of what’s going on in his personal life?
- Compared to the beginning of our relationship – do our conversations get deeper and more meaningful?
The answers will tell you if you have communication problems. And if you do – there are many ways to fix them, at the end of this post I will show you one way to do it.
8. He never compromises
Most of all, he doesn’t feel like he has to compromise with anything in his life.
That makes you the only worker in your relationship. You must juggle with your life, move appointments, change plans and shape yourself according to whatever your guy needs and wants.
Why should you be the one that always “needs to change”, “must accept him as he is” and “don’t bother him with anything”?
Here’s the thing: I don’t like compromises either. Neither you do. Actually, no one does.
But they are one of the 10 most important relationship habits you must have to build a strong relationship. If he’s not willing to compromise then he’s not ready to put effort into your relationship. The conclusion is only one: he doesn’t care about you anymore as much as you’d like him to.
9. He gets angry for no reason and that’s a huge sign he doesn’t love you
This is one of the disturbing signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
It is also a sign I wish I don’t know how it feels.
In my previous relationship (the one that broke my heart into a million pieces), I always had to be very cautious of what I speak and how I speak it. The guy was getting angry for no reason, just like that. He would look at me and just immediately get snappy and push me away.
I was feeling unworthy and less of a woman for almost as long as our relationship lasted.
But the truth?
He wasn’t angry at me. At least not really.
He was angry at himself mostly because he was confused about his feelings and the decisions he’d taken so far. I was just a reminder he made another wrong turn in his life. Sad, but true, I was stuck in a toxic relationship.
Is your partner getting angry with no reason all the time?
It could be because he’s realised he doesn’t love you (or on his way to realising it) and doesn’t want to face the consequences.
10. He doesn’t need your opinion anymore
It’s not like he has to ask you for permission or anything like that. He is free to do whatever he wants with his life.
Or is he?
If you are in a serious relationship (or want to be in such), almost every decision you take will affect the other person in one way or another.
It’s a no brainer that if he wants to quit his job and you live together that will affect you. Or he starts smoking, gets into a fight with his family or even decides to go vegan.
Whatever it is, if he decides to change something in his life – it will affect you. And that’s normal. That’s why we call the relationship a partnership too. You are the CEOs of your company (the relationship).
Does your guy ignore you when he has to decide on something important in his life? Are you the last to find out what’s going on with him?
That might be a huge sign he doesn’t care about you anymore and to him, your opinion doesn’t matter.
11. He is texting other girls
Why would he do that if he truly loves you?
Because he’s free to do whatever he wants with his life?
But what about you? Where do you stand in this situation? Pretending it’s OK to see him chatting and flirting with others? If a situation like that doesn’t make you feel loved and isn’t comfortable for you, just pack your bags and move on with your life. He doesn’t care about your feelings.
12. He doesn’t make time for you
I get it, we all are busy living our lives.
Want to know a secret your man doesn’t want to admit?
If he truly loved you, he would make time for you.
Does he love playing games? I bet he makes time to play.
Does he like spending time with his friends? I bet he makes time for them too.
When we love doing something or being with someone, our whole life gravitates around the idea to end up doing that thing or being with that person.
As simple as that.
Just look at yourself.
You make time for you two because you care about him. How does he reply to that? Does he even care about you?
13. When you tell him you love him, he hesitates before answering
I know it hurts.
And I know what’s the worse part of it…
It’s the fact that every time you tell him you love him and see his hesitation something dies inside you. Every. Time.
Because deep down in yourself you know he doesn’t love you anymore.
There shouldn’t be any hesitation, any pause, no looking away or rolling his eyes — none of that.
There should be love. Unconditional.
14. He refuses to talk about it and gets angry
Would you get angry if he’d come to you and tell you he isn’t sure you love him?
You would be worried. You would ask him what made him feel that way. You would be concerned you did something that misled him.
So, why does he get angry about it if you ask him the same?
Why does he hides behind his anger and uses it to avoid the painful conversation?
I’ll tell you why.
It’s because he knows he cannot hide it as well as he wants. He doesn’t love you anymore and needs time to accept this. Anger and attack is the best defensive tactic ever. So, he uses it every time he needs to drag the attention away from the problems.
15. If you don’t contact him, he probably won’t contact you either
Have you ever wondered why he never texts you first in the morning?
Do you want to know why he never calls you just to hear how you are?
That’s the one sign he doesn’t love you that screams “disrespect” so loud that it would be nonsense to ignore it.
Do you wonder in how many other ways he is disrespecting you? Head over to this post to see the 10 most disturbing signs of disrespect you most likely ignore all the time.
16. Intimacy doesn’t feel so intimate anymore
Have you noticed that your love life gets colder and emotionless?
In fact, you still do it, and it’s still nice…
Except, it doesn’t feel so connecting and intimate anymore.
It feels cold, and it’s like you do it “just because you are good at it”.
Yep, that’s a sign he doesn’t have any deep feelings for you. He doesn’t really love you.
17. He doesn’t make plans with you
That’s one of the biggest signs he doesn’t love you anymore and I must admit…
Even I’ve done that one.
I was with a guy, and I was planning to break up with him when we see each other, but he kept texting me to make plans for Christmas. I made up some stupid excuse and hated myself for it. But it was just for a day or two.
What if your guy doesn’t want to make any plans for the future with you?
There’s only one logical reason: he doesn’t plan to spend that future with you.
Bonus Sign He Isn’t In Love With You Anymore
There is one more sign he doesn’t love you anymore, and it’s the most important one.
It’s the fact you don’t feel loved.
I’ve said it so many times on this blog – I know how it feels to be loved, and I know how it hurts if you aren’t loved.
It’s not only that you don’t feel he loves you, but you feel ignored, hurt and meaningless. And that’s the biggest sign you must end things with him. Don’t wait for him to decide your future. Life is too short and too beautiful to waste it waiting for someone to man-up.
Want to know one more secret?
More often than not, we ignore the little voice in our head that screams “Run!” all the time. We choose to fight for him, to prove him we deserve his attention, to force him to accept us in his life.
We search for proofs he doesn’t love us just to be sure he doesn’t cover the points.
But he does.
Am I right?
Share in the comment below your signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
Be strong, and as a person who’s gone through all this and more, I could tell you: There is someone who waits for you to start loving yourself so he could start loving you too.
What to do next?
A while ago I gathered a team of professional relationship bloggers and relationship coaches and asked them to share their best relationship resources for free with you.
Many of these free resources will help you in your current situation.
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