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How Do You Know If You Are Compatible With Someone?

How do you know when you are meant to be with someone? What if you could say from the beginning that your future will be bright?

I used to be a “predicter” in my past relationships. I’ve always tried to understand if “that guy” would be a good match for a long-term relationship, or I should just stop wasting my time and keep searching for the one who will love me truly.

Hence, the questions from above and their only possible answer: It’s all about the compatibility in the relationship. Great! Yet, how do you know if you are compatible with someone?

What is relationship compatibility?

Relationship compatibility happens when both partners match several levels in the relationship, such as views, goals, lifestyle, values, and more. It might be hard to say from the very beginning if two people are compatible, yet it’s surprisingly easy to see compatibility pretty early – in the first few months.

With that said, relationship compatibility is like a measurement tool to predict the success of a relationship by looking at how many levels of the relationship you match.

In this post, I will share my top 12 points you need to tick off when measuring your compatibility with your partner.

12 Ways You Know You are Compatible With Your Partner

1. Easy to talk to!


You two never struggle with having a boring conversation. You always have something to share, something to let each other know, and questions never stop flowing from your end to theirs.

You know you are compatible with someone (or at least have a big chance to be compatible with them) if it’s easy to talk to them.

I’ve seen it all. I’ve had relationships where we would talk for hours and hours in a row and never get bored from conversing on yet another topic. And those were the relationship where I truly saw huge compatibility with the guy. I’ve been on the other end too – nothing to say and constantly wondering how to keep the communication flowing around more easily.

2. You Share The Same Energy

This one might be a bit tricky and completely ignored, yet it is the reason you like someone on a deeper level or completely forget about them three minutes after you meet them.

And no, I’m not talking about the energy levels in your physical body. More likely, I mean your spiritual level of development and the type of soul energy you exchange with each other. It sounds weird no matter how I put it, but I guess I mean that you want to feel good around them and vice versa.

Many women feel uncomfortable around their partners; they shy away from being open to them, asking favors, or initiating conversations they don’t always feel comfortable talking over.

And it’s not like it’s the guy’s fault. It’s just that there’s something in the air that makes things a bit weird and uneasy. That’s not what you are looking for.

3. Level Of Sensitivity

Yep, another thing that needs more explanation. Yet, you know you are compatible with someone when it’s not easy to be offended by them. Let me explain.

The way we speak and interact with each other is very different, and each one of us has our own understanding of where boundaries lay and how much we allow others into our personal space. As a result, we might offend someone (unwillingly) just by saying something in a way that doesn’t fully resonate with them. Vice versa: it’s easy to misunderstand someone’s good intentions if the ways of expressing ourselves don’t match.

With that said, you are compatible with the person who doesn’t struggle to communicate with you, and none of you are afraid the other will take things wrong.

Of course, respect and proper communication skills are always essential. But you will have an exception to that rule in one way or another. Yet, the rule stays the same.

4. You Laugh At The Same Stuff


And I don’t mean TV shows or FB videos of funny cats.

Your humor should match, or nothing else will. Fun is what could make or break a relationship. Fun and laughter are what make life easier when it’s not easy at all. The gift of making the other laugh will often save your relationship, your mood, your days, and your happiness.

Most people have no sense of humor, and that’s fine, as long as their partner is (kind of) lacking it too (or at least they don’t mind keeping the jokes aside).

Other couples love pranking each other and none of the pranks leads to a split up.

And some people are just total fans of dark humor and can’t leave without their morning dose of sarcasm. I am one of them, and one of the things that have saved my sanity and made our relationship strong was that my fiancé completely gets each of my jokes (not always ear-pleasing).

How to know if you are compatible with your partner? Do you freely joke with each other and don’t take things personally? Then you have high chances of creating a healthy relationship together.

5. You Argue The Right Way

First of all, there’s no one right way to argue with each other. My sister and her husband argue with such a passion that they used to even throw freshly-baked pies at each other (okay, my sister was pregnant then; hormones were ruling, but still). Yet, they’ve been married for 10 years, have two beautiful children, and truly are building a strong, happy marriage.

My partner and I have been together for almost five years, and I cannot recall a serious argument between us. We don’t shout at each other, we don’t argue for days over some little stuff, and we keep our tempers under control if needed. Yet, we don’t hold anything back either. It just happens in the calmest way possible (depending on the type of issue, of course).

The way you argue with your loved one is so crucial that you might even believe it’s the most important one of all signs of compatibility here.

Being on the same page of the way an argument should be is vital. If he is getting overly excessive when arguing and you are quiet by nature and panic if he yells, you have a problem. One of you must adjust, and that’s another topic for an argument.

6. Same Goals/Ideas


I love talking about this sign of compatibility. And I enjoy touching on the subject in almost every post on this blog because my experience with ex-boyfriends could be all summarised with the title “How She Believed Different Life Goals Can’t Break a Relationship.. and She Was Wrong”. Horrible title, I know. Nobody is going to read the book, yet the truth stays there.

Your goals should match on basically every single level. You need your partner to be on the same page as you are, or none of you will achieve anything in life.

Mutual support is essential for a healthy and prospering relationship that even if everything else on this list doesn’t match perfectly, this one could actually make things work.

Waking up in the morning and having the same eagerness to climb to the top of the world or stay in bed and enjoy mindfulness and cuddles is what you both have to share.

7. You Are Not Afraid Of Being Yourselves

When none of you is afraid of being themselves, you know you match perfectly. You know you are compatible, and nothing can stand in your way.

Being yourself, however crazy, lethargic, wild, and confusing that might be, is as important as having enough air to breathe.

Can you imagine living a life where, in the name of fake love, you have to pretend you are not yourself? No. You should speak, sing, jump, cry, question, and (respectfully) argue the other’s words whenever your heart wants it.

Are you two being yourselves with each other? You are compatible.

8. Similar Lifestyle

I already touched on this one a few times, even if I named it differently. You know you are compatible when your lifestyles are matching.

And there are so many ways to check this one. Do you both enjoy clubbing on Saturday night, or you both prefer hiking and conquering one mountain after another? What about your background? If you come from different types of families, are you ready to respect and accept the differences? Will you find your way around every wall that will pop in front of you?

9. You Are The Same Weirdos


People call you weirdos, yet you two know why being that way is important to you. You believe no one else understands your connection, and that creates a sense of secrecy and “your own” mental safe place to hang in.

Let me disappoint you and say that every couple believes they are weirdos and the coolest ones. And that’s a good thing because it creates a deeper connection. That connection you have is just with your one and only, and I think you might have met him.

10. You Are Fixers Instead of Runners

Okay, explanation is to follow.

More and more people are becoming “runners”. They see a broken relationship, and they just run from it by breaking every bridge on their exit run.

And then there are the fixers. They know that everything could be fixed if both parts are willing to participate in the fixing. They aren’t afraid of long fights because they believe that’s how they progress. It’s not a cliche to say stuff is breaking and could be replaced, but relationships with people are something you fix and don’t just throw in the trash can.

11. You Don’t Shut Each Other Out During Argument or Out of It

Yes, we talked over the argument point a lot, and there’s a good reason for it.

My last relationship (before I met my fiancé) was with someone who would shut me off his life for most of the relationship. He would stop answering his phone, close himself in another room, or plainly tell me he needs some space and he needs me away from his life. That’s just rude, yet I was taking it because I thought I loved him, and that’s what you do for love – you are waiting to be called and needed.

And since you shouldn’t care about my experience too much, you should absolutely believe me when I say that shutting each other off your lives works for a few months, and then you just have to make it stop.

Since you are searching for signs of compatibility with your partner, I assume you are in the relationship for the long run. Hence, the thought of a life-long experience (some people call it marriage) actually stays quietly on the back of your mind and takes measures for wedding rings.

Therefore, thinking about the future, shutting each other off when kids, mortgage, and everyday life are present is not an option at all.

12. You Look Forward To The Same Future


Since I already mentioned it in the previous point, thinking of having a future together and planning it together is a huge compatibility sign. No matter if you’ve been together for a year or two weeks. You probably already know if you both want a serious relationship (no pressure to talk about marriage, of course), or you’re here just for the fling.

Conclusion on how you know if you are compatible with someone

These were 12 signs of relationship compatibility you can’t ignore.

No matter if you both are in your early twenties and all you want is someone to enjoy life with, or you are in your early thirties and dream of a white dress and screaming bundles of joy, relationship compatibility has its same quirks and importance.

You know you are compatible when you tick off all those boxes and you do it from the bottom of your heart. After all, the heart knows if everything is just as it should be or there are some red flags you want to check on.

Whatever your answer, make sure you are in a relationship that makes you happy and lifts you up by making you a better person.

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How Do You Know If You Are Compatible With Someone?

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